Tammy Duckworth: Life’s Whole “Gift”

Review by Bill Doughty

I have a good American friend in Japan who bristles when people call his sons “hah-fu” –– half Japanese, half “gaijin” (foreigner).

“They’re not half,” he explains. “They’re doubles!”

The first chapter of “Every Day Is a Gift: A Memoir” by Tammy Duckworth (Hachette Book Group, 2021) is titled “Half Child.”

As a mixed race child, Tammy Duckworth was bullied by Thai kids (and even her cousins) for being larger and whiter and freckled –– a “half,” a “less-than.” She was called “farang” (“whitey”). But that would be one of the least of the problems she would face –– as presented in her deeply personal story of overcoming discrimination, disability, and disappointment.

Duckworth’s mom is Chinese by birth; mom’s family escaped Mao’s persecutions in Communist China by immigrating to Thailand. Duckworth’s dad is a former United States Marine who became an officer in the Army and eventually a federal civilian worker. The family lived in Bangkok and Jakarta as well as Phnom Penh, Cambodia, during the Vietnam War.

Tammy and her family escaped Cambodia in 1975. She remembers vividly watching Operation Frequent Wind on TV from the safety of Bangkok –– the evacuation of Saigon by American helicopters to U.S. Navy aircraft carriers in the South China Sea.

Tammy, age 3, in Bangkok

Later, nearly penniless, she and her brother and father came to Honolulu. Like many DoD brats, Duckworth had to move a lot. Eventually she would live in Winchester, Virginia; Washington, D.C.; and DeKalb, Illinois.

In “Every Day Is a Gift” Duckworth shares both her adventures and her many difficulties growing up with a patriarchal and domineering father and devoted but sometimes distant mother.

After her father lost his job and the family’s savings, Tammy lived a harrowing life as a teenager in Hawaii. Her first Thanksgiving in the States was at the Waialana Coffee House (which closed down during the COVID-19 pandemic).

As for prejudice and discrimination in her new home, fortunately in Hawaii people embrace the concept of “hapa” for mixed race people, but of course in Hawaii most folks aren’t “halfs” or “doubles”; they’re “multiples.”

Duckworth attended McKinley High School, whose alumni include multi-talented Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson and legendary Senator Daniel K. Inouye. In high school she met Inouye, whose arm was blown off by a Nazi soldier in World War II. Tammy had no idea that one day she, too, would be a wounded warrior and, in her case, a double amputee.

Her association with the military started tangentially when she got a temporary position with the U.S. Naval Institute, famous for publishing Tom Clancy’s first blockbuster, “The Hunt for Red October.”

She attended ROTC for a summer at George Washington University and was propelled to enroll full time in ROTC at Georgetown University. That’s where she fell in love with military life in general and the Army specifically. She met her future husband in uniform in a humorous encounter highlighted in the book.

At 23 she pursued international diplomacy studies at Northern Illinois University and found her home.

In the National Guard as an Army Reservist, Duckworth was able to follow her passion, pursue post-graduate studies, and work while serving her country. She says this about the sacrifices and service of Guardsmen and Reservists:

“There are several reasons people prefer the Reserve forces. Some don’t want to give up civilian jobs that pay better than military service. Some don’t want to commit to moving around every two or three years, which active duty servicemembers have to do. Some of them have already served on active duty and enter the Reserves after finishing their commitment.

One thing we all have in common, though, is our desire to serve. Being a member of the United States military is a privilege and an honor. When our country calls us to undertake a mission, we stop up, even if there’s a personal and professional cost to us. Citizen Soldiers do this over and over and over again –– and nonmilitary people don’t even know about it.”

Lt. Col. Duckworth joined the military before women were authorized to serve in combat, but she got as close as she could by becoming a helicopter pilot. She describes flying over the Egyptian desert and passing the Great Pyramid of Giza in Operation Bright Star. She flew low over the Amazon rainforest in Guyana  in Operation New Horizon. And she piloted missions in Iceland to clear glaciers of rusting equipment from World War II in Operation Northern Viking.

But the most harrowing experience, of course, was what happened on Nov. 12, 2004, when Duckworth’s Black Hawk was shot down in the Iraqi desert.

Both of her legs gone. Her arm badly mangled. Shrapnel in her face and body. Her fellow soldiers thought she was dead, but they refused to leave her body behind.

U.S. Army Warrior Ethos comes alive in the aftermath of the shootdown as Duckworth’s teammates extract her nearly lifeless torso and arrange for a medieval to Baghdad, where troops lined up to give blood. She needed 40 units of blood, plasma, and platelets.

Duckworth’s recovery at Walter Reed Army Medical Center is told in painful detail –– how she bore a “wall of pain,” learned to walk with two prosthetic legs, and came to terms with her new circumstances after the tragedy in Iraq, where she says, “There’s a piece of me there, both literally and figuratively.”

At Walter Reed she had to have parts of her body surgically removed and used to repair her mangled arm. She showed unimaginable grit and toughness, mixed with typical wounded warrior morbid humor and resolve.

Duckworth’s story is one of superior resilience. “I had no choice but to power through,” she writes. “It made no sense to lie around and feel sorry for myself. I had to accept my situation, then start working to change it.”

Found Haiku in “Every Day Is a Gift”:

When the obstacle

is effort, then there is no

obstacle (at all)

Something bad happens

you can either let it own

you, or you own it

(And) no matter how

grievous the wound, healing is

always possible

I found this book at Barnes & Noble bookstore on Memorial Day. It is a perfect companion book to one recently featured in Navy Reads: James Patterson’s “Walk in my Combat Boots.”

In fact, Duckworth’s missing combat boot is symbolically returned to her by fellow soldiers in a pivotal part of her story.

During her recovery and after meeting Illinois Senators Dick Durbin and Barack Obama, Duckworth resolved to enter politics. 

She was influenced personally by wounded warrior public servants Senators Bob Dole and Max Cleland, who helped her confront post-traumatic stress disorder.

“Senator Max Cleland, who lost his legs and an arm in Vietnam, sought treatment for PTSD three decades after his injury, when he lost an election in 2002. I met Max while at Walter Reed, and talking to him helped me to truly understand that the best we can do is take life one day at a time.

In the summer of 2005, when I realized I would never fly for the Army again, that advice from Max helped save me. I was no longer sure what my purpose in life would be, but I had to just take it one day at a time, and be open to whatever came my way.”

Obama, Akaka, and Duckworth

She fought for reforms at Walter Reed and the Veterans Administration, first in Illinois and then in President Barack Obama’s administration. She fought to make a national difference, first as a representative in the U.S. Congress and then as a senator. And she fought to become a parent.

Lt. Col. Duckworth’s struggle to become a mother and her realization that there is no such thing as “work-life balance” can be an inspiration to women and a revelation to men.

In Congress Duckworth was helped by Senators Kristen Gillibrand and Amy Klobuchar, among others. The late Senator Daniel K. Akaka honored her by bestowing Hawaiian names for her two daughters.

Her choice to enter politics so she could help people is not surprising.

Early in her life she saw first-hand the need for a social safety net and equal opportunity for people of color. Fifty-four years ago, in June 1967, the Supreme Court ruled in Loving v. Virginia that interracial couples, like Duckworth’s parents, could marry.

Her father’s hero was President Ronald Reagan. In the aftermath of the Vietnam War, Reagan signed the AmerAsian Immigration Act that allowed many Southeast Asian “half-children” into the United States. Of course, they were not “halfs.”

In “Every Day Is a Gift” Senator Tammy Duckworth, who lost nearly half her body in combat, shows that every person can be part of a greater whole. She lives the teamwork ethos –– no one left behind.

This is a marvelous and powerful book filled with tears, smiles, revelations, and inspiration. Like “Walk in My Combat Boots,” this book comes with an endorsement from Adm. William H. McRaven (U.S. Navy, Ret.): 

“Raw, unfiltered, powerful –– a compelling story of courage and determination against overwhelming odds. Tammy Duckworth is a true warrior who overcame a difficult upbringing, a glass ceiling, and a horrific helicopter shootdown to become one of the most respected senators on Capitol Hill. Nothing can stop her.”